you ever wanna fuck the living shit outta somebody but also cook for them and make sure they’re emotionally stable?
Is the alphabet called the alphabet because the first two letters in the Greek alphabet are alpha and beta?
Are there literally 75,000 people who did not realize this?
Get the fuck off your high horse yes clearly that many people didn’t know that about the fucking Greek alphabet sit down and shut the fuck up
did you hear about the italian chef who died?
he pasta way
he just ran out of thyme
here today, gone tomato
his wife is still upset, cheese still not over it
we never sausage a tragedy coming
ashes to ashes, crust to crust
there’s just not mushroom for italian chefs in today’s world
I went to an Arab-American comedy night and there was a Muslim guy making a joke about being in high school football.
"I was hit so hard, I saw Jesus. Do you know how hard you have to be hit to see somebody else’s god?"
This is what jokes about religion are supposed to look like.